Tag Archives: Inspiration

Get Your Ducks in a Row

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I started my business full time a little over a year ago after a national nonprofit I worked for went through a restructuring. I had just gotten an exemplary yearly evaluation and a lovely bonus. Suddenly, I was offered a severance package and transitional services. It was a shock and I struggled to process what had happened while figuring out what was next.

I decided to just take the leap and do this thing that I love – coach full time. A short while later,  my coach was helping me work through this new development.  Not surprisingly, I expressed I was having some fear, grief, anger – all the things you would expect to feel.

My brilliant coach said, “So what’s your first next step? What are you feeling like you need to do?”

I replied, “I need to get my ducks in a row.” We then talked about what that meant. It could have included “busyness” like website redo, new business cards, systems and processes to build my capacity to serve more clients, etc. etc. Really Busy Stuff. But honestly, what it meant for me was first getting my head in the game. Aligning my mind and my business goals with what I want to do, my vision, my why, my business philosophy. My values.  Everything should be synced and pulling me forward.

A few days later, I found this.

My row of ducks

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What’s weird about this little bit of pewter goodness is that in that moment, I truly didn’t remember EVER SEEING IT BEFORE. I just turned my head one day while journaling in my favorite chair and there it was, in the bookcase in front of some business books. Yes, that’s right. Business books.

I freaked out a little, I’m not going to lie. Where did this come from? How did it get here? It’s in front of my business books!!!

I began searching my brain and remembered where it came from. It belonged to my mother. Then I remembered even more – my sister gave it to her and it was especially meaningful  because mom had three girls. I probably found it in a large mass of boxes brought to my home after my mom died and decided hastily to pop it into the bookcase rather than donate or give it away. I have probably seen it hundreds of times but never really took it in.

In that moment, after I had declared to my coach that I needed to get my ducks in a row, it suddenly came into my view and I got it.

Magical.

Now, it became a symbol for what I needed to do.

Fast forward to now, just a few months past my one year, full-time business anniversary, I’ve been reflecting a lot on what I’ve accomplished, what I haven’t accomplished (I spend way too much time on that one) and what I‘ve learned.  Oh, the learning.

I was cleaning and decluttering my desk the other day and moved my laptop and found the little ducks again. There they were – there they always are – reminding me. A little talisman.

“Get your ducks in a row, Laurie.”

It’s an ongoing process, right? It isn’t ever really over. Sometimes my ducks walk out of line.

Like recently, when I made a decision about an opportunity that was so out of line that I almost instantly realized I needed to pull that duck back in. Every day that duck was out of line was a struggle for me.  I made an impulsive decision that wasn’t aligned with my overall vision. And I knew I needed to let it go.

You see, I have this list of things that I usually go by in order to decide if something is right for me. An opportunity has to tick all these boxes. This one didn’t really tick any of them.

So, I am letting go of the regret and blaming I was doing about taking this thing on in the first place. Because I have discovered that while this detour was all wrong for me, it has taught me a lot more about myself. And has led me to discover some pretty incredible opportunities I would maybe have ignored before. For whatever reason, it was meant to be, but not for very long. I veered off to the right and it took me just a short time to get back in line.  I remembered what it’s like to feel aligned. I found myself again. And when you find yourself again, it just makes you realize even more how important it is to be your complete self.

Thanks to my ducks.

So let me ask you – what’s on your list of boxes? What do you have to check in order to decide if an opportunity or relationship is right for you?

How does it feel to be connected to your complete self? How do you know when you are not in the place you need to be?

How is what you’re doing now aligning with what you want to be doing?

Is there something  that feels out of range – either out of control, out of alignment or out of your ability to accomplish?

What do you need to do in order to get your ducks in a row?

What have you learned from the things that weren’t right for you?

What’s next?

 

If you need some help, I am always available to help you get your ducks back in a row through a coaching session. Contact me if that’s something you need right now. 

 

Just Five Minutes – Visualize what you want to accomplish!

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To accomplish great things we must first dream, then visualize, then plan… believe… act!

Alfred A. Montapert

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today’s Just Five Minutes assignment is about visualizing what it is you are trying to accomplish. I believe it’s important to use visualization because it helps you create a mindset, or a belief, that you can succeed. You know – that’s one of my 4 Elements for Success!

In today’s video, I am sharing why I think this works, and it’s not just because I’ve experienced it first hand. I’ve seen many clients use it as well to land the job they were seeking, to succeed as entrepreneurs or to experience those bucket list items they have dreamed about.

I’ve used it not just to sell a house, but to buy the house I am writing this blog post in right now.  I saw myself working in this very business, in this very office almost six years ago today. Visualization helps you to align your thoughts and beliefs so that inspirational ideas and the right people and circumstances all come together to achieve your goal.

Visualization itself isn’t enough. Don’t forget there are 3 other elements to success. But it’s a fun and easy way to help you get there.

If you have questions or need more help along the way, just reach out and ask.

Here’s to your success!

Just Five Minutes – Visualize Your Success

I’m Glad I Keep Remembering This

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Created by Leigh Stanley for DEMDACO, a Curly Girl Design

I bought this lovely little thing from a local shop a long time ago. It’s been hanging on one of my cabinet doors for awhile. I see it every single day. But, I don’t read it every single day.

Today, I turned my head and really took notice of this lovely little reminder. And lately, I have been thinking about this a lot – this sense of doing something that matters to me. That helps me create a wonderful life.

Last week, I was talking to a colleague about how being an entrepreneur has challenges that those who are in a 9-5 position working for someone else don’t always think about. Like if a client is really slow to pay, you have to take out of savings to pay the mortgage until that check finally arrives. You have to work nights or weekends to get things done or because that’s what works best for your client. You’re always looking ahead, adding services or getting excited and ready for a little more networking time. It’s all on you – you don’t answer to anyone but yourself. You decide when – IF – you take time off. And while that sounds divine to some, it can get old some days.

This week, I was at a hospital for several hours and found myself watching nurses, doctors and admin staff while I was going from place to place.  They all had a specific purpose and their days are pretty routine, I’m sure.  “In the mornings, we _______.” “I have to make sure I _____.” “Only two more days till the weekend!” I found myself seduced by their job predictability.  Eight hour days, holidays and personal leave time, this is how we do this, this is how we do that.

But do they really love entering data into computers, walking patients from the clinic the pharmacy, or pushing carts into elevators to deliver something to another department? Are they fulfilled? Do they think their job is wonderful? I don’t know.

Just as I was having these thoughts, I found myself at the pharmacy and saw a woman I worked with a long time ago. We counted money all day in a cage. I was in college, just looking for some extra money and she was in transition from closing her own restaurant to finding steady employment with benefits for her sick husband. Weirdly, I am now the entrepreneur and she’s delivering medications to sick people. Routine. Predictable. Steady.

What I do know is that when I have these thoughts, I am only temporarily seduced. Yes, it might be easier some days to sell books at a bookstore or to take car tag payments at the tax collector’s office. Routine. Predictable. Steady. Maybe even easy! Or it appears to be any way. But would it be meaningful? Or would it feel to me like nothing at all? I remember that feeling well. The feeling that I couldn’t do something new or exciting. The feeling I wasn’t being creative. The feeling I wasn’t doing work that I really loved.

A lot of people find a great deal of joy and excitement in their work, no matter how routine and predictable it might be. Or maybe they just don’t want to take that leap and be on their own. And there are days I think the leap to being in full-time business for myself is wild and crazy and hard and I want to give up. But I don’t.  Because I LOVE to coach people. I LOVE to write. I LOVE engaging people in training sessions. I LOVE working at home with my furry team. I LOVE to create and find resources for clients.

I don’t have a feeling of dread on Sunday nights as I think ahead about going to work on Monday morning. I don’t have to wake up at the crack of dawn to get ready and begin the commute.

I keep moving forward, one client at a time. Yes, it’s slower than I’d like. Yes, I’m ready for more clients – absolutely ready!

My heart and my hands and my mind share an occupation. I am a coach. I am a writer. I engage people in the discovery of ways to do work that they too can love. My goal really is to help their hearts, their hands and their minds find an occupation that creates a rich and wonderful life. I help them discover and give them permission to do work that brings them the greatest satisfaction. Whether that work is routine and predictable or wild and crazy with no limits.

I’m glad I keep remembering this.

The Power of a Notebook

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One of my favorite notebooks – Laurel Burch designs always make me happy.

You may think I’m going to talk about the famous Nicolas Sparks movie that everyone loves and correlate it to everyday life. But, no.

I’m talking about the power of keeping a notebook by your side, everywhere you go, to record your thoughts, ideas, learning points, motivational quotes, dreams, goals and connections.

The power of a notebook is simple and yet so profound. If you carry around a small pad with you everywhere you go, nothing you ever think, hear or say is lost to you. You never have to worry about whether it will come back around again or what happens if you forget it completely. It’s there – in ink. Until you decide to deal with it.

And I am a big believer in carrying one with you to meetings, keeping one on your desk, in your car, in your purse, on your nightstand – everywhere you may need one in case something sparks.

And don’t forget the ‘dealing with it’ part. It’s not enough to keep writing things down. You have to do something with them or those ideas are no good to you.

So here’s an example of what’s in one of the notebooks that I carry around:

Notes from a Women Entrepreneurs’ meeting in May about the Imposter Syndrome, minutes from a board I serve as Secretary, notes from a conference call for a client, ideas for speakers for my podcast, Just 5 Minutes blog ideas, a couple of quotes and some personal goals. In another notebook, I keep notes on books I am reading and books I want to read during the month. (yeah, bookish girls make monthly book goals).  The notebook by my bed ensures I remember dreams or other thoughts and ideas I have while I am just waking up or about to go to sleep.

I also write Morning Pages every morning  and sometimes have ideas while I am journaling (I have done Morning Pages, inspired by Julia Cameron’s work for over 10 years – see here for more).  But I can’t keep them in that space because I’d have to remember what day I had the idea. I simply transfer the idea to the notebook that’s the best fit and I’m all set.

What happens to those notes? I pull out and file the Imposter Syndrome notes to use for clients or for a future workshop topic. I type out the board minutes and mark them as done. I act on the conference call notes, speakers, and blog ideas.  I make the quotes into Memes for social media and I transfer the personal goals to my planner if they are a monthly goal or to my year-long plan if they are long-term.

Notes can also be delegated to someone else – staff, friends, family members, colleagues – whoever might be able to execute a task or move an idea into production.

If you review the notes and decide you really don’t want to do anything with that idea, you have a couple of options: discard it forever or give it to someone else who might want to act on it. That’s easy for me because I often think of ideas that will help my clients and this is a great way for me to remember those ideas between sessions.

Personally, I collect notebooks so that I’m never without one when I need it most. The prettier they are, the more I love them. I have small ones, larger ones, spiral bound and staple bound. They don’t have to cost a lot. I’ve even found some cute little notebooks at the Dollar Store or in Target’s dollar bins.  Some of mine have gorgeous, textured or leather-bound covers. Others are plain and perfect in their simplicity.

 

Just a few of my current notebooks.

If this sounds like it will work for you, pull a notebook out of your supply cabinet or junk drawer. Or go pick one up at the store. And start recording those ideas that come to you while you are driving, eating or sleeping. You’ll be glad you did.

(And for those who don’t like the paper and pen kind of notetaking, use an app like Evernote or the Note pad on your phone. You can also record notes on your voice memo recorder as well. Just make sure you have it nearby when the inspiration strikes.)

 

 

Just Five Minutes – Explore Podcasts

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Today’s Just Five Minutes is all about the value of Podcasts. As you can see from this video, there are a LOT of them to choose from. You can be entertained, educated and enthralled by Podcasts that are archived or added every day.

Just Five Minutes – Explore Podcasts

In the video, I mentioned one of my favorites as the Women’s Entrepreneur Association, but it’s actually the Female Entrepreneur Association Podcasts by Carrie Green.

Also, the Podcast Serial on This American Life can be found here:

Another favorite of mine is Harper Collins Presents. This link is to the iTunes subscription, but if you don’t have iTunes, I’m sure you can subscribe in another way. I’m currently obsessed with the audio retelling of After the Funeral, by Agatha Christie. It’s delivered in parts and I feel like I understand what it must have been like for my parents to listen to a radio program once a week and have to wait for the next installment.

Hope you enjoy a podcast or two. And as always, let me know what love to listen to.

That’s your Just Five Minutes for today. I’m off to find out what happened to the Abernathy family After the Funeral or to Bowe Bergdahl in the second season of Serial.

 

 

My One Little Word

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This is the second year I have chosen a word to guide me throughout the year. I first heard about this from my scrapbooking friends – One Little Word is a class taught by Ali Edwards, who is kind of a big deal in those circles. While I haven’t taken the class, I like the idea of creating a personal ‘word’ and reflecting back on it all year.

So this year, I hadn’t yet settled on a word when my world was rocked. On January 8th, my part-time position with a national nonprofit was suddenly eliminated. We had gone through a restructuring the year before, and I was still hanging in. So admittedly, I was surprised when my grip was loosened. Stunned. Felt the floor shifting under my feet. It was a great job and I thought I would be with that company until I retired. Surprise! Not so. Nope. Not today.

When I regained my footing and got some clarity, I created my one little word for 2016. It is:

 

BRAVE

 

I realized I was going to have to make sure this business of mine brought in a full time income, rather than a part-time one. It mattered now whether I had clients who stayed with me, new clients to replace the old and tax money put aside all along the way rather than at the end of the year. My fears and anxieties would have to be pushed aside or dealt with in order to do my best at this and be successful.

What fears do I have? Oh there are a lot of them. I would tell you about all of them, but that would give them voice and I try not to let them talk a lot. It’s easier that way. But here’s an example.

A lot of people who know me know that I am an introvert by nature. Yes, I can act as if I am an extrovert, but at my core, being alone and coaching people one-to one energizes and delights me. Networking? I don’t Prefer it. But I learned long ago to tolerate it. Some days, I even embrace it.

Let’s just say, I chose this word and then what happened?

  • Embrace networking? Enter new clients who bring me weekly opportunities to network with people I’ve never met.
  • Create an LLC rather than a sole proprietorship? Enter an opportunity to learn a lot of information that confuses and frustrates me, but keeps moving forward, step by step. And allows me to work with and learn from people I genuinely love.
  • Expand into a new market? Enter the opportunity to drive into New Orleans and Mobile to attend meetings and meet with referral partners.

These are the ways I have to continually get into the framework and action around my one little word.

What I’ve noticed is that once I set my intention around this word, all sorts of opportunities have shown up for me to prove that I’m committed. Beyond opportunities, the word shows up in articles, conversations, songs and just everywhere I look. There are two songs that have been in my iTunes playlist for years– one is Brave by Sara Bareilles and another is the song Learn me Right from the original soundtrack of the movie Brave. (This one is really special to me because it was gifted to me by a client who thought it described what she got out of coaching with me.) When I shuffle my songs, both of these songs ALWAYS come up. And let me tell you, I have a large iTunes library. So the odds are like 2 in 4589. And they didn’t used to show up quite so much as they do now.

Today, I was actually inspired to write this post about my one little word because I was reading a book by Thomas Leonard, considered by many to be the father of coaching. He wrote this book called The Portable Coach to help people be more attractive and create a strong personal foundation using these 28 strategies he thought were critical to practice. I decided to take a look at this book again since I hadn’t read it in many years. Strategy number one already reminded me of how brilliant he really was, but this quote really got me. It’s on the Very First Page!  Seriously. I can’t make this up. So here it is – get ready:

“Because fortune really does favor the brave, and the brave are guided by their own lights.”

 

Bam. 

 

2016 One Little Word

I always create a little Project Life card for my scrapbook to remember my One Little Word for the year.

A Crumple and Cry Day

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Did you ever have one of those days that began with something going wrong? Let’s say it was a BIG bad thing.  Or maybe a medium bad thing and then maybe then something else happened and another thing happened and the next thing you know, you’re crying and you can’t seem to find the motivation to do anything?

Been there. Plenty of times.

I used to think it was my adult duty to pick myself up, dust myself off and start all over again. That’s what I was told. Some days.

But I also was told that crying happens. It sometimes happens when you least expect it and for no apparent reason. Nothing has to go wrong to make you feel like crying. Bad days happen. Negativity takes control. Crying ensues. And often, once it starts, it feels like it won’t stop any time soon.

And crying is cathartic. It can be necessary.

Instead of trying to bury the emotions under a pile of things to do or people to see, I decided years ago that I just needed to surrender, on those days, and have what I call a Crumple and Cry Day. It allows me to grieve over all the injustices that have piled up against me, or those I love and care about, big or small. I just need to surrender to what I cannot control.

No, I don’t cry all day. At least not constantly. I may cry for a bit, stop, cry again, get quiet, cry on the yoga mat, watch tv, cry…etc. I find though that they key to a successful Crumple and Cry Day is just to clear my calendar and settle in for the day and let it unfold as it is meant to do. (Yes, sick days are allowed. If you’re heartsick, take a sick day.

Sinking my feet in the sand, listening to the waves crash on the beach, mimics my internal swell of tears while bringing me to a place of peace.

I don’t have to stay at home and cry. In fact, I often don a pair of sunglasses and cry as I walk the beach, or sit on the front porch. Don’t try to push it down any more, just let it all bubble up and see what you learn from it. You may be surprised at how many little things you’ve been holding on to. Or it may just be one BIG thing. And if that BIG thing comes up on more than one Crumple and Cry Day, it’s a signal that your work isn’t finished.

Crumple and Cry Day doesn’t have to be a whole day. It’s just as long or short as you need it to be.

What happens at the end of a Crumple and Cry Day? I’m tired. I have no more tears left for the time being. And I have generally opened up a space for me to take the next step. Having released all the built up sadness or anger, I can stand in a moment where that container is empty and I am ready to fill up another container with something good. Something possible. Something fresh and new.

If you’re in an overall healthy state of mental wellbeing, crying is a very cleansing, healing and refreshing experience. You might want to keep a notebook nearby as you move out of the sadness and into the peace and calm that follows. It really is almost like decluttering your physical spaces – once you surrender the stuff you’ve been holding on to, you open your heart and mind to what you need in that moment. So listen and be ready to write it down so you won’t forget.

I know some people worry that if they surrender and start to cry, they will never stop. And if you have more Crumple and Cry Days than days filled with possibility, I’m going to suggest you reach out to someone for help. See if that container needs to be washed by something more therapeutic than you can offer yourself.

Let me know what you think. And if you have a way of cleansing and releasing your stuff, tell us about it in the comments.

 

 

Just Five Minutes – Change it Up!

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Today’s Just Five Minutes is about changing up where you work.

We often get in a rut and think we have to work from the same space in the same office. But sometimes, changing up your space can stimulate your creativity and help you see things from a different perspective. In fact, changing your environment can inspire you to think of new ideas or fresh ways to tackle a project.

So take a few moments to look at this video, then pack a bag and go work somewhere else. Even just an hour or two will make a difference.

Just Five Minutes – Change it Up!

Book Review – Five Good Minutes at Work

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Five Good Minutes at Work

Title: Five good Minutes At Work

Authors: Jeffrey Brantley, MD & Wendy Millstine

ISBN: 978-1-60671-240-5 (Note – this cover image  is from a different version than the one I am providing detail for here.)

Published 2007 MJF Books in arrangement with New Harbinger Publications, Inc.

(previous edition published in paperback.)

Rating: 

As promised, I am providing a review of this book. The authors have several Five Good Minutes books for you to check out if you’re interested.

I first became aware of their work when I received Five Good Minutes in the Morning as a gift one Christmas. Several years ago, I left a rather difficult team meeting, browsed in Barnes and Noble’s bargain section and found the work version. I definitely needed it.

The writers bill the book as “100 mindful practices to help you relieve stress and bring your best to work.” There’s a Foundation chapter, followed by the Practices, which helps to introduce you to the benefits of mindfulness, breathing, listening and being present. The rest of the short practices are divided into these sections:

  • Doing Your Work More Effectively
  • Reducing Stress at Work
  • Working More Intelligently and Compassionately With Others
  • Travel, Deadlines, Frustrations and Other Opportunities

As a coach, I really see the value in these practices and can say, first-hand, that I benefitted greatly from them as I struggled to stay engaged with a dysfunctional team for several months before leaving that position. Yes, there are a lot of practices that deal with working with others. But that isn’t the main focus here. Many of them help you deal with crisis, overwhelm, setting yourself up for a productive day and more.

The authors stress setting a daily intention, which, in my experience, is absolutely a habit that will bring you into more of an awareness of your purpose for the day and feeling as though you achieved it. There is a time during each piece for breath and affirmations like “Whoops! I’m human. I’m fallible. I make mistakes just like everyone else. I accept this inevitability.” You know I believe in positive affirmations, and I think getting in touch with this reality is a very positive thing. We set ourselves up for failure when we set ourselves up for perfection. A potential downside is that some of the affirmations or meditations can seem a bit repetitive. For some folks, this may be helpful as this makes it easy to practice and remember what to say each day. For others, it may be more redundant than you’d like.

I have a lot of daily meditation type books that I love. But sometimes, reading one every day is overwhelming too. This book isn’t 365 days worth of practices – just whenever I decide to pick it up will do. Personally, I generally pick it up when I’m NOT having five good minutes. But maybe that’s when I need it the most.

Just Five Minutes – Launch

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Hey there! Today’s post is a video telling you about a new series I am launching here on the blog and on YouTube called Just Fie Minutes. It’s inspired by a couple of books I picked up a long time ago called Five Good Minutes and Five Good Minutes at Work by Dr. Jeffrey Brantley and Wendy Millstine. While these books generally discuss mindfulness and intentional actions for the day, my Just Five Minutes series will focus on specific things you could do in five minutes each morning or each week to move you forward.

Here’s the video launch. I hope you’ll stay tuned for Just Five minutes. BTW – You can subscribe to my YouTube Channel and get all the videos over and over right here.

Just Five Minutes – Launch