A Mid-Year Check in

Posted on June 14, 2019 by Laurie Johnson

photo by picjumbo.com

As we are almost to the halfway point of the year, I am spending time in reflection about the way I’ve been operating in life and in business so far. I use a combination of journaling, looking back over my plan for the year, and brainstorming what I’m feeling is missing or needs to be eliminated.

I also take time to celebrate where I am at this mid-point. That’s important to me, as I am naturally inclined to seeing what I haven’t done with a critical eye, rather than embracing the successes I have achieved.

Among other things I’ve done this year, I’m celebrating my steps forward in achieving my next level of coach credentialing. I’ve really taken the main focus off of acquiring more clients and have shined a light on technique and coaching competency. It’s uncomfortable at times and my inner critic has spoken up more often than I would like. But it’s been a huge learning process that I haven’t undertaken for many years, and it feels satisfying.

I’m celebrating another successful half year as an entrepreneur. Building a coaching business takes time and I can honestly say that I am looking at sustainability, continued growth and refinement. What else am I longing to do?

One of them is writing and blogging. I find that these are often the first things to get pushed out when I am “busy.” I have at least 5 book ideas in my head, but so far, I’m not coming to writing from a place of choice as I prioritize my time for writing and creating each day.

I also find that I sometimes avoid social media because it can be a depressing place to be. Yet, I want to create an uplifting corner for followers here on the blog and on my other social media sites.

I see so many “ads” and posts from other coaches about how they “leveraged Facebook to create a six figure income.” And, of course, how they help other coaches to do the same for a mere $10,000. How about the untapped power of Instagram? When I do pop in, I am bombarded with offers of free books about blogging or IGTV to make me rich. Rich enough to be able to afford their exclusive VIP program.

Honestly, that isn’t the way I want to be in my business relationships with clients. I want my connections to be authentic and meaningful, as I continue to move forward as a coach and as a business owner. I want a personal relationship, not an online conversation in a Facebook group or a series of pre-recorded training videos. In fact, I also need to stop signing up for these things or looking outside of myself for resources to succeed. I don’t need a program created by anyone else. I know what I need to do to attract new business and sustain the amazing clients I already have.And in order to do that, I need to open myself up to more conversations with people I want to work with and who want to work with me. So how do I want to approach this?

I want to give content and tools, rather than taking names and emails to filter through a squeeze page of just “one more bonus offer if you sign up today” or “click here to get this amazing offer that will skyrocket you into six figures.”

I want people to want to work with me because they had an experience of me in some way. And they believe that when we partner together, we will both benefit exponentially in ways that go beyond money or followers.

What does that look like? Maybe monthly or quarterly free events as I used to do years ago. Possibly live chats on YouTube where we talk about whatever is important to each individual that is watching. Trainings on the 4 Elements for Success – a deep dive into each one.

So, as you look at this past six months, what is it that you are celebrating so far this year?

What else are you longing to do?

What might you want to avoid or get rid of?

What will Enliven you as you step forward into the Summer Solstice?

What blooms most vibrantly for you right now?

As we approach the longest day of the year, may you find the time to shine a light on what’s most important in your life and work.

I Have A Love/Hate Relationship With Social Media

Posted on May 17, 2019 by Laurie Johnson

I’ve been on Facebook for awhile. I don’t know how long. I originally balked at the idea of creating a page. (I was, however, an avid MySpace user. What ever happened to MySpace??)

My youngest daughter convinced me that it was a good idea because I would be able to see many current pictures of my kids and my granddaughter. She was a baby, so I am guessing I joined some time in 2007.

I signed up for a Twitter account in January, 2009. I only have a little over 800 followers. Clearly, I’m not consistent.

Instagram – April, 2012.

Pinterest – Lord knows when.

YouTube – Yep. I’m there too. Look at the last video. I’ve cut my hair five times since then! (I’m more active sharing books on this channel for sure. Maybe that’s where my spare time is going?)

The point is…I can’t keep up with all of this stuff and I don’t even try any more. And sometimes, it annoys the hell out of me.

I think social media brings out the best and the worst of us. Just like I believe that we generally carry a blend of the best and the worst of our parents around in our pocket. Sometimes the best qualities emerge. Sometimes, we default to those phrases, habits or behaviors that don’t represent us in a generous light.

In the past 10 or so years, I have watched social media users say things that they might never have said in a face-to-face conversation. It’s escalated to a point that makes me cringe. Hastags like #fakenews are usually inserted when someone decries a media post about one highly charged or sensitive topic or another. I’ve seen examples of the very worst of human nature and I often see more than one in a day.

So why am I still logging in to these sites and sharing/posting/liking/commenting?

Because there are more examples of things that bring me joy.
Because I want to share joy with others.
Because life is too short to criticize another person and too long not to lift someone up or encourage them along the pathway.
Because I am connected to my tribe in groups that let the rest of the ugly fall away.
Because, despite all the things I dislike about social media, there are memories captured in each place that are important to me.

Like the tweeted photo of the night I met Kristen Chenowith and she sang a song about Mississippi to us after we saw her perform in Promises Promises.

How about my first blog post ever about my daughter leaving for college on MySpace?

Photos of my son’s graduation from University of Alabama as a Paramedic.

The first glimpses at my granddaughters births shared on Facebook.

Shares of my mom crowned as Mardi Gras Queen at the assisted facility where she lived nearby.

My daughter-in-law’s growth as a mother and entrepreneur.

Special Olympics events where my oldest carried the torch and competed bravely.

Numerous dance competitions and awards won by my tiny dancer.

And the business accounts I’ve created for 4 Elements Coaching. My infrequent posts are now proof that I am busy enough that I don’t have time to blog, tweet, post and share as often as I might want to do.

So yes, I may get tired of the complaints and insults and #fakenews. And yeah, I’m pretty inconsistent. But the honest truth is I’ll probably be around for awhile. And sometimes you may find me in person and we can chat a bit IRL. Which for me is infinitely better than your comment or laughing emoji.

And maybe soon, I’ll have to hire someone or learn a complicated new batching system through sites like Hootsuite or Meet Edgar to be able to really be consistent and keep up with it all. (Meet Edgar would be my choice just because it has a cool name!)

See ya around the Social Meeds! (cuz I’m hip like that).

Summer of Self Care – Day 14

Posted on July 14, 2017 by Laurie Johnson

Self-care and Online Connections

These days, there are a lot of troubling things happening all over the world. It used to be that we got news from a couple of nightly news shows, magazines or the newspaper. But now, we see news throughout various social media platforms and apps, which also provide notifications of breaking stories throughout the day.

This constant exposure to real time, shocking or upsetting information can lead to feelings of anger, frustration or fear. And these emotions can cause anxiety and increase our levels of stress.

Yet in times of stress, many of us crave connection with others. After all, it is this connection that helps us to feel loved and cared for, right?

Conversations on social media can be delightful, fun, affirming, overwhelming, time-consuming, frustrating or anxiety provoking.

Add to that a constant barrage of notifications that you have email waiting, some with the high priority symbol or a red flag, and you’ve multiplied those feelings exponentially.

How can you practice self-care by limiting or scheduling when you will consume this information?

We’ve already talked about Tech Free Days and how they can benefit your self-care routine. You may decide that you want to include Tech Free Days regularly and can find ways to manage your day-to-day activities while limiting or temporarily eliminating your social media.

It also starts with an awareness of how you’re feeling about each media source. Does Facebook or Twitter continue to bring you joy? Or are you constantly feeling angry, helpless or hopeless? Make a list of what you consume every day and start making tick marks in the Joy or Stress column to see if the good feeling you get when participating outweighs the stressful and anxious feelings.

If you want to keep up with news, you might limit watching just before bed or first thing in the morning. This can start or end the day on an anxious note. The beauty of technologies is that you can access most of this information on demand, allowing you to decide exactly how much and when you will take it all in.

Scheduling time to check email and/or social media throughout the day can protect you from unwanted assaults or interruptions. This strategy can definitely increase your productivity – most of us who respond immediately to a notification from news or social media tend to then spend at least 10 additional minutes online after reading the article or post that brought us there. Multiply that times just 10 notifications a day and you’ve spent 100 minutes online without even intending to. If this happens during the work day, you’ve lost 100 minute of productivity. This may make you feel like you can’t get caught up, intensifying your anxiety and stress.

Setting a reminder to check email and social media three times during the work day may not work for everyone, but you can certainly give it a try. If you check first thing in the morning, just after lunch, and again about an hour or so before the end of the work day, that keeps most people up to date. Of course, if your work requires an immediate response no matter what, this scheduling technique may not work for you. Or perhaps you can find a back-up or strategy to connect to those emergencies without being tethered to the notifications constantly.

Consider ways in which you can connect with people IRL (in real life) again. It’s interesting to me how I still sometimes resist having coffee with someone because it means I have to put on makeup, dress a certain way, leave my house and stop what I am working on for a period of time. Or we email someone rather than call them for something because it’s… what? Easier? Faster? Convenient? Avoidant?

Face to face or voice to voice connections will become a thing of the past if we let them. But truthfully, they can be beneficial to our self-care. I give and receive this experience with a lot of fellow coaches because we can become very isolated in our primarily work-at-home-alone routine. Inevitably, one of us says, “I really needed to talk to you today. This really helped me a lot.”

On the flip side, social media can, for some, be a form of self-care and connection. Reading another blogger’s take on this recently, this hit home for me. Here’s a post from Rest for Resistance on self-care for the radical social media user.

“Offline self-care works great for some people. Yet it’s harder for those of us who don’t have space to sequester ourselves at home with friends and family. Due to isolation, many of us don’t have room IRL to even believe that we deserve space in our own lives. Social media is simply a better source of hope than the outside world.

We all deserve community, and many of us find that online.”

The bottom line is that, aside from the requirements of your job, you get to decide how and when to connect with email, news and social media sources and design your self-care plan around what works best for you. Maybe for today, your act of self-care is just being more aware of how you’re feeling and what might work better for you tomorrow.