A Magical Day

Posted on October 10, 2010 by Laurie Johnson

Today is 10/10/10, a somewhat magical day in the world of numerology. I learned that a colleague got married today. In fact, many people decided to marry or do other exciting things on binary dates which are unique and memorable. You might not be planning something huge – maybe you didn’t plan anything at all. But it isn’t too late to consider a few things to make the day memorable.

Another coach, Cheryl Richardson, decided to share a few lists today and I thought I would borrow her idea and create a few of my own. Take a look at my lists of Ten Things and then create your own based on what works for you. And enjoy this magical day!

Ten Things I Will Say YES To:

1) Time with my family

2) A walk in the woods

3) An hour a week of self care

4) Moving my body

5) Reading a good book

6) Special notes and calls to my friends

7) Lots of clean, fresh water to drink

8) Gratitude journaling

9) Creative time

10) Petting my dogs

Ten Things I Will Say NO To:

1) Gossip

2) Negative Thoughts

3) My inner censor who tells me I’m not good enough

4) Drama and chaos

5) Judgment of myself or others

6) Stressful situations

7) Clutter and messes

8) Feelings of lack

9) Procrastination

10) Tolerations

Ten Things That Contribute to a Great Life

1) A loving partner and/or family

2) Pets

3) A daily practice of gratitude

4) Supportive friends

5) A mentor

6) Work that inspires

7) Beauty in all forms

8) A quiet space to relax and feel comfortable

9) A home that rises up to greet you

10) A deep understanding of your authentic self

I hope you will take time to make your own lists of Ten Things. When we take a moment to think about what we want to include in our lives, we really begin to design an environment that pulls us forward to where we long to be.

A momentary choice to change

Posted on September 9, 2010 by Laurie Johnson

“Everyday, God gives us the sun – and also one moment in which we have the ability to change everything.” ~ Paulo Coelho

from Kevin Dooley

I read a lot of books and blogs and often work with clients on deliberately creating what they want using spiritual laws like The Law of Attraction. It’s still a hot topic these days and many of my clients come to me because they have a big dream they want to turn into reality. Knowing I practice many of these principles myself, they ask me to check their sentences, help them dissolve their limiting beliefs and find peace in the present moment. This work requires an open mind and a willingness to continually pivot your thoughts and beliefs -there’s a learning curve for sure.

One of the tenets of this belief system is that what you really focus on and desire for your life has already come about in your future. You just can’t see it and experience it quite yet. So the idea here is that you act “as if” and remember that it has already happened, which creates a sort of certainty that alleviates any current stress, desperation or worry about whether or not this is possible for you. Sounds a bit complex but I’ve been on the receiving end of some pretty amazing stuff as a result so I’m a believer and a fan.

But when things unexpectedly go wrong, or even just a little rougher than you’d expected, it’s easy to fall back into old patterns of behavior like crying, biting your fingernails, pacing…you get the idea. Today was one of those days where an ominous phone message led to a stressful phone call and suddenly I found myself in the middle of an impromptu, self-inflicted manicure. And it was starting to go downhill from there. I felt the need to change everything, stop the freight train to the abyss and get control again. So, I tried something new – I conjured up my future self and had a little chat with her.

“Hi future Laurie. I really need to ask you if I’m going to be able to convince this woman to waive these penalty fees for this nonprofit so we can go forward and save the world one woman at a time again. I don’t want to be anxious about this for days on end. I just want to know I’ll do this right and find a fair and equitable solution. “

“I can see you’re worried,” future Laurie says after noticing the ragged edges of my nails. “I seem to recall a conversation with the woman from the tax office. Did you call her yet?”

“No, I wanted to check with you first and see how you thought I should handle it. I could play dumb but that’s not really our style, is it? I’m thinking honesty. Understand her position. Leverage what we have going for us now.”

“ Hmmm. Yes. I remember,” future Laurie begins to smile. “ I explained what happened – a set of unbelievable circumstances, wasnt it? She wasn’t buying it but I remained calm, courageous yet knowledgeable and capable. She eventually caved and waived the fees. The world righted itself again pretty quickly. Feel better?”

“Much.” My breathing returns to normal and I experience an inner shift to calm. “Thank you so much.”

“Don’t mention it. I understand the appeal of staying present – it served me well a lot of the time. But every now and then, you have to really see a thing working before you can work it out in the moment.”

Anxiety and worry are generally a product of ruminating in the past or living in the future, not staying in the present where you have control. But every now and then, a trip to your successful future might be just what you need to create a successful now. Just like you can reclaim your inner child when you want to have a little fun or need to heal a broken piece, you can check in with and leverage your future, imagining how you could succeed in the present situation.

And maybe it will save you from diving in and munching on too much chocolate or ripping the nails down to the beds.

Let me know if you’ve tried this with success or if you think it’s too strange for words. Be nice – I don’t want to have to go back and buy little Laurie a banana split with double hot fudge…or do I?

Forever Changed

Posted on August 29, 2010 by Laurie Johnson

Five years ago today, I lost almost everything I owned in a perfect storm named Katrina. While we drove farther away from the Mississippi Gulf Coast, flood waters moved into our home and carried our refrigerator into the living room. Hundreds of books became a pile of unreadable mush. We stood in stunned silence in a Florida motel room packed with our girls, four dogs, a hairless rat, two gerbils and boxes of what we thought was important enough to take with us, watching the destruction on the television. And when we returned, we slipped into an instant shock as we saw cars smashed up against buildings, slab after slab lined along the beaches and the most intimate belongings strewn along tree branches or melded into fences. At one point, the pile of debris in the front of our yard was taller than the roof of our house. We wondered if we would ever feel better. Coming together on streets that looked like a battlefield, we asked our friends and acquaintances if they knew who survived and who didn’t. Helicopters overhead reinforced the feeling that we were in a third-world country. I questioned whether we should live in a place where something like this is possible. Our children grieved over the loss of memorabilia that spanned their short lifetimes. We cried over the things we didn’t consider important enough to stuff into the cars. We longed for walls, a television, a home cooked meal in a ‘normal kitchen,’ a FEMA trailer and a bed to sleep in. And we were terrified that we wouldn’t have the means to rebuild and carry on.

We couldn’t think ahead much past the next week or maybe, if we stretched it, the next month. Living in the present wasn’t something we struggled to perfect – it became default mode as we didn’t want to relive the trauma of the recent past and we couldn’t quite grasp the concept of a normal future.

Let me tell you about the volunteers. I still can’t fathom how people put their lives, careers and school years on hold to come and muck out house after house. People came to us from all across the nation and cried with us as we took stock of what we lost. We felt their love and they felt our losses as they were confronted day after day with the aftermath of the trauma. You would think they would want to run away and stay in their own comfortable homes with their healthy, happy families. But they stayed, or returned again and again. Americorps volunteers, students from Queens University and many other colleges, church members from every denomination – they all rushed in to help us when we couldn’t help ourselves.

Now, I sit in my living room, typing on a laptop and watching the Emmys in High Definition. The air conditioner hums softly in the background and I have electricity in every room of my house at the same time without having to prioritize appliances into a small number of working outlets. I just returned home from a celebration in the little town of Bay St. Louis where countless friends and community leaders came together to remember those who lost their lives and to take stock of how far we’ve come. Businesses still struggle to stay open another week. The oil spill has us all feeling more than a little beleaguered. And we might always hold our breath through most of July through September, hoping this doesn’t happen again.

Let me tell you about what I gained from Katrina. I know how to hang and finish drywall now which I suppose sets me apart from many of my peers. My neighbors and I now know each other by name and we still do little things for each other to make life easier. Almost all of my possessions are new and my house is more open and comfortable, yet I’m very detached from all things material and mundane. I found coaching which I believe is my divine, soul purpose. Gratitude has become a daily practice and my spiritual life is deeper and richer than ever before. Words like content, delighted and peaceful are used to describe how I feel on a daily basis. And I have this inner silent knowing of the soul that is unshakeable.

I hope my family and I never have to go through this again. But I know we can survive the unimaginable. As strange as this sounds, I’m grateful for Hurricane Katrina. From much destruction came an incredible rebirth. Five years later, I can tell you – I am forever changed.

A Whole-Hearted Beginning

Posted on August 10, 2010 by Laurie Johnson

“There is a book inside of me.” You too? I’ve known it since I was a child. In fact, the desire to write has been the only avocation that has been a constant in my life. This yearning to make a living as a writer is what I call my soul purpose. It is also a source of great frustration when I consider that unfinished book that still roams around the pathways of my brain, looking for an unlocked door that will lead to completion, or even a whole-hearted beginning.

What stops me? Any number of things. Time. Fear that I’m not good enough to write anything. Subject matter. Work. Children. Writer’s block. The heat of a Mississippi summer. You name it, I’ve probably tried to blame it.

I’m not even committed to fiction or nonfiction. In fact, I think I have at least one of each floating around in there. And as much as I love coaching, I know that I will always reserve some time to write something, even if it’s just a blog.

“Just a blog.” See how easily that rolled off the tongue?

This book is like an apparition that forms more fully at various times and then drifts away, hiding for awhile so that I settle comfortably again into my life of limiting literary beliefs.

The truth is we tell ourselves a lot of crazy things when it comes to creating art in any form. Creatives are often conflicted by limiting beliefs that may have originally been formed by a 2^nd grade art teacher who told us we better not hope for a career as an artist. Or the college professor that ripped our Comp 1 paper to shreds, noting sarcastically in the margin, “I’m not sure you showed up today.” Criticism is both the thing we crave and the thing we fear the most. It tears us up while validating our secret fears about ourselves.

Years ago, I was introduced to the book The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. I began reading and instantly felt a connection to the author, her struggle and her technique to help artists – creatives – go deep on a spiritual journey and come out on the other side, shiny and new. I did the exercises and felt small shifts begin. And I kept the practice of morning pages to this day. But, hurricanes and weddings and classes and work got in the way and I put the book and the rest of the exercises aside, hoping for a magical day when everything would come together and words would pour out of me onto approximately 250 pages or so.

It’s not going to happen unless I make it happen. And I know I’m not alone.

So I created this group – a year long journey through The Artist’s Way with some really neat people that I don’t really know who have the same fears and hopes and dreams for themselves and for their work. As a coach, I can facilitate the work, bring in resources, guide participants to go deep within and watch synergy happen as master minds come together. As a group, the participants can show up each month and enrich the learning for me and for each other, bringing their best to the call and finding soul sisters and brothers that will celebrate successes with them forever.

You don’t have to have a book inside of you to bring the element of creativity into your life. You don’t even have to have a desire to be anything. All that’s required is a curiosity about the work you want to do and a willingness to step out onto the path. I’ll hold your hand if you’d like.

The Element of Fun

Posted on August 2, 2010 by Laurie Johnson

You may have noticed – I hope you noticed – that we were offline for awhile. A series of wonderful and not so wonderful things happened and we’re back in business, thanks to Aletha McManama and the folks at GoDaddy. I lost a few posts and learned a lot about the process of blogging and preserving blogs as well as how Twitter can provide instant customer service response.

So here we go again with a do-over of sorts. A mulligan, if you’re into the game of Golf.

During the stressful moments of the past few weeks, I discovered things were feeling a little rushed and humorless. I wanted things to feel fun and frivolous instead of heavy and hard. The crazy busyness of the last two months has calmed enough for me to recognize that my connection to the work has been too worky.

So I decided to hire my 3 year old granddaughter Kandyce and my 3 year old Beagle, Charlotte as consultants in my business. These are two girls who can really draw me into the fun and make me remember to stop taking things so seriously.

Since they started, we’ve incorporated a few additional practices into my business:

Playing with the Talking Tom Cat App on my iPhone.
Regular breaks to run around the house chasing each other make us more productive.
There are endless ways in which to laugh and giggle.
We use the Whisper-ma-Phone during meetings to mix things up a little.
Naps are a good way to dream up new ideas.
Singing at the top of your lungs makes you feel free.

Is the element of fun missing in your work process? Are there eager consultants all around you who can bring more fun or creativity into your business?

For me, bringing the element of laughter or lightness back into the mix can really free up creative energy and move me forward if I’m stuck in a rut. And spending time with the people who remind me that this is what it’s all about makes me happier about the work in general.

In between naps and fun breaks, I’ve been creating a new coaching group and meeting wonderful writers and creatives in person and in my own little corner of the virtual world. I hope you’ll join us the August 31st as we look at the Element of Creativity and begin a year-long journey of reawakening your creative spirit. Make sure you’re on my mailing list so you can be included in the announcements. Or if you can’t wait, email me and I’ll tell you all about it.

I’m off for a little giggle before bed!

Connections

Posted on July 29, 2010 by Laurie Johnson

I am on a continuous awareness journey around strengths, both my own and the strengths of my clients who often hire me to discover what they want to be when they grow up. I have this desire for people to connect with work that makes them come alive. And, I have a desire to connect people with people, forming community and building on the collaborative strengths so that we effect change in our own backyards, oceans, cities and burgs.

Today, I had a conversation with a fellow coach who really gets this about me – that inner desire that I have for products, ideas, people, tweets, pages and colors to connect and join with each other in a way that brings beauty or brilliance to the world. In fact, she and I connected through our mutual love and respect of Seth Godin and the upcoming Linchpin meetups. (And here, because of my love of connections, I must digress and inform you that if you’d like to participate in a meetup in your community, go to www.meetup.com and search Linchpin). I’m not sure that connectedness is just a strength of mine – I think it’s a way of being.

So here are a few additional connections I’ve made lately that bring me joy.

A set of green, battery free speakers that connect to your iPod – www.origaudio.com
A book that connects women to their inner, authentic self and how that self relates to food and God – Women Food and God by Geneen Roth
A man who connects you to Community – Peter Block
Jewelry that connects you to your energy muse – www.energymuse.com
MS Coaches Association – a group of coaches in Mississippi who connect regularly
Our local Main Street Association that drives business to our Main Street shops
Carolyn Haines, Alice Jackson, Virginia Schaefer and others who contributed to Delta Blues or helped promote it. (which also connected me to the knowledge that Alice and Mary Perkins are quite possibly as fascinated with the Kennedy assassination as I am!)

What a tapestry of connections I could weave here for you. Suffice it to say, I love the magic that happens when people meet, talk, share, tweet, create and explore.

So you know what would make me happy? Share your connections with me here so that I can make even more interesting connections that will change my little world in amazing ways.

The Good, The Bad and The Inevitable

Posted on June 29, 2010 by Laurie Johnson

June has been a month of grieving for me and my family. One of our dogs died suddenly the very first day of the month. We are dog people. We danced with him in a constant marathon of love and joy. I still have difficulty putting words to our grief.

Then I put on a conference I had agreed to plan as a part of a grant for a nonprofit that I work for. Event planning is something I can do but usually choose not to. To me, conferences are like weddings. You get everything planned and along the way your stress level causes you to overdose on chocolate and you cry puddles of tears over the fact that someone accidentally shrunk your favorite sweater when the real reason you’re crying is that one of your speakers cancelled at the last minute. I was miserable to be around for about two weeks. I blamed God and the Moon and British Petroleum for all the things I wasn’t getting around to do or settle into for myself.

Then, just as I was starting to embrace joy again, my mentor and dear friend died suddenly. She was 86 years old and having good days and bad. She hated feeling out of sorts and would have chosen the sudden exit over a long drawn out illness. But I still feel cheated out of a last visit.

Those are the bad moments of the past month. But the good moments lasted much longer than just an ordinary June in an ordinary year.

I had ten years of unconditional love from a dog who was born and died during a rainstorm. Catching a tennis ball gave him more joy than almost anything in the world. Noah taught my daughter how to be a great mommy to a loving and gentle pet. He read with children at the library and comforted pre-schoolers who were exposed to domestic violence. Pulling on his ears, our granddaughter would gently place her Barbies on his back for a ride around the living room. And now when she spends the night, she asks me where he’s gone. Our other dogs grieve and we all look for him in the usual spaces.

And Betty Spencer taught me the value of connecting people for the betterment of humanity. Once in awhile, I would pop over to check on her and soak up her energy. We’d talk for awhile and she’d smile in this sly, knowing way and suddenly say, “Here’s why I called you here today.” As if she had some telepathic influence over my life, she would go on to outline some person or project I needed to be connected to. And I would agree, no matter how much stuff was on my plate. Because when Betty thought something was important, it was more than important than any of us ever realized. Her energy came through her eyes, grabbing hold of you and commanding you to pay attention. Her exuberance was barely contained in her average frame. And there is a temporary void in Mississippi and South Louisiana – but one that we will fill with our memories, our plans, and our mandates to carry on the work that she began in all of us.

So the inevitable losses that cause us so much grief also bring us a deep knowing that our lives are better for the beings that we share them with. I will find a container for my grief and open it slowly when I need to. Memories will flood in and out as I discover one of Noah’s tennis balls under a bed or come across a note Betty wrote to me across a meeting room.

For today, I choose to mention them in the hope that just a piece of their peaceful and loving energy will flow on. In very different ways, theirs was an amazing journey of soulful purpose.

Resisting Blogging

Posted on March 15, 2010 by Laurie Johnson

I have resisted creating a blog for over a year now. I have nothing against a blog. In fact, I am an avid reader and appreciate the way blogs have elevated writers to the top of their field, helped politicians get elected, and informed people about things that would otherwise have remained completely under the radar. Blogs have the power to change my little piece of the world in so many ways. So why the resistance?

To be effective, blogging requires commitment. I reasoned that I would need fresh and frequent ideas. I must provide value to the reader or I will go against the grain of my authentic self. Putting myself out there in blogspace a couple of times a week frightens me a bit. And who am I to think that I can stand laptop to laptop with the likes of Havi Brooks?

And lest we forget, there’s a learning curve associated with blogging and I’m not sure I’m up to it. Tags, trackbacks, pings, nested pages – yes, one of my top strength themes is Learner but I’m not sure I want to learn this stuff. It seems tedious somehow – too far from my right brain tendencies.

But I find myself at a crossroads. I am ready to coach full time. I crave opportunities to write, share, and create community. I have launched a project that will push me beyond my current boundaries and take me to a new place. In short, I am turning down a different path on this walk through the woods and I’d like to carry on with a blog for this leg of the journey.

It may be one of my roads less traveled but I think it has the power to change my life in a profound and empowering way and maybe add value to yours in the process.

So, lets give it a go, shall we?