When someone changes your life, you honor them.

Years ago, a girl who worked with me introduced me to the work of a woman named Louise Hay. Linda was leaving our company and I remember going to Barnes and Noble to buy her a going away gift of some of Louise’s books, because she often talked about how much her work had helped her. Even after that endorsement, I wouldn’t take a real look at anything Louise had written for years.

I can’t exactly recall how it happened, but I was reminded of her again just before or just after I discovered the idea that coaching might be a way for me to move forward after Katrina.  First, someone else I knew said, “Have you read anything by Louise Hay?” And then a few weeks later, my first coach quoted Louise in a session. She then told me that Louise had an online radio station called Hay House Radio and it featured a coach whose work I also admired, Cheryl Richardson, and a guy whose work I had discovered in college named Wayne Dyer. She said, “If you’re willing to take a look at this, let’s talk about it next week and how it might speak to your current dissatisfaction with what you’re doing.”

To say I looked is an understatement. I devoured Hay House Radio and ordered one of her books. I downloaded podcasts featuring all of them and listened whenever I was in the car. They all said things I had no doubt heard before, but that at a time that I wasn’t really listening the way I was then. I was ready. It was time to change my thoughts and to change my life.

Where I am today in my work and in my beliefs about myself are like night and day. My thoughts aren’t perfectly positive every day – in fact, far from it! I’m just more aware of them most days. Some days are still crumple and cry days for sure. But I’m always moving forward…always equipped with this one key to success. Thoughts are things. What you think about comes about. Because when you change your thoughts, you change the way you feel. And when you change the way you feel, your level of self love, happiness, presence, and belief and hope changes the way everything else unfolds for you.

I’d heard these concepts in church when I was a child, but the way these teachers described these concepts made it all connect for me. It wasn’t woo woo or metaphysical to me, but a practical application of the same principles that had been written and practiced by thought leaders, disciples, priests and kings.

I began gratitude journaling daily. I repeated daily affirmations as a way of taking what I used to think of as prayer into a whole new level. I learned that believing something could happen was the first step, followed by actions, and then miracles would follow. And they have.

Wayne died two years ago yesterday, leaving behind a legacy of written and spoken words.

Louise died yesterday at the age of 90. Exactly two years to the day after we lost Wayne. They were colleagues, friends, and faithful supporters of each other’s work. I can’t imagine their joy at being reunited again.

If you’ve never picked up one of Louise’s books (or Wayne’s)  or listened to one of her audio or video presentations, I encourage you to do so. Her life story is incredible to hear.

But today, I just want to take a moment to use my words to honor a woman I never met and to be grateful for all that she was to me. To say that she changed my life is also an understatement. My 4 Elements for Success are based on these principles that I learned and used to create my business. I wouldn’t be where I am today, sitting on my couch in a home that is perfect for me doing work that I love more than anything I’ve ever done, without the wisdom this woman shared with me and with the world.

 

Are You Ready To Make Your Life More Meaningful?

Thanks to all of you who were able to join the call Monday night. I enjoyed the experience of sharing what I’ve learned and listening to your shares on the call and after. It’s clear that there is a desire inside of many of us to create lives that are deeply aligned to our passions and strengths. I hope I can help you discover how to design a more meaningful life design. If you weren’t able to join the call, here is the recording (feel free to save and listen again). 

Make it Meaningful Call Recording

I am starting a new Make it Meaningful Group that might be just what you need to begin designing your intentional life. 

The group begins on Wednesday, January 28th, 2015 at 8pm EST/7pm CST and lasts for three sessions. (Note that I had the date wrong on the call – it is WEDNESDAY, January 28th!) During these sessions, participants will discover: 

  • Values – what is it you truly value and how do you design your life and work to align with these important priorities. 
  • How to make a clean sweep – What’s cluttering up your life and your mind? How do you de-clutter and remove the things that you are tolerating? 
  • End Results – what do you want to do, have or be by the end of 2015? And how do you stay on track to make sure you get the results you’re looking for? 

This group is limited, so you’ll want to decide and register soon. If you sign up by January 27th, you will be able to participate for all three, one-hour sessions for just $150! This is a significant savings over my individual coaching fees and the most inexpensive group I have ever offered. . And if you want to experience coaching, but can’t afford individual coaching rates, this group might be the best way for you to experience coaching right now. 

In addition to the group coaching experience and assessments, group members will be linked to a closed Facebook group to share during the three months of sessions and beyond. And as more Make it Meaningful groups happen over the course of 2015, those members will be added as well. So for your investment of $150, you will get: 

  • Group Coaching – three one-hour sessions
  • Three assessments to help you get closer to understanding where you are and where you want to go;
  • Access to closed Facebook group for shares, wins, resources and motivation for as long as you want it;
  • Support from a trained and certified coach and other group participants; 
  • First chance at upcoming groups during the rest of this year; 
  • 10% Discount for three months of individual coaching fees if you decide to continue the coaching experience beyond or during the group. 
  • End of the year wrap up to check in and provide you with the opportunity to assess and set new meaningful goals for the coming year. 

So – are you ready to Make it Meaningful? Registration ends at 7pm on TUESDAY, January 27th, 2015. I hope you will join me for this life changing group. There is power in group coaching and in deciding you are ready to make a change! 

Sessions will be on the last Wednesday of every month: 

Wednesday, January 28th
Wednesday, February 25th
Wednesday, March 25t

To register, call me at 228-467-8470, email me at LaurieJohnson@4elementscoaching.com or go to the Contact Us page and fill out the form to register. Make sure I have your name, phone number and email. I’ll contact you to make sure you are registered before the call. 

I’m No Fool

from stagevu.com

Jiminy Cricket I\’m No Fool

It’s hard for me to believe that I turned fifty years old a few weeks ago. I didn’t come at this birthday kicking and screaming, although my forty-eight year old self definitely thought I would. Toward the beginning of the year, I felt a bit squeamish about the whole idea. But as September neared, I settled into an acceptance combined with a curiosity about how the next half of my life will play out.

You see, I am going to live to be 103 so I’ve got a lot of living left to do! As a child, one of my favorite short films became a sort of mantra to live a long and healthy life. My mentor, Jiminy Cricket, showed me ‘How to Have Fun Safely’ and live to be 103. (You can see Jiminy in this cartoon short by clicking here or on the link just under his picture.) The lessons I learned from Jiminy as a child felt very different than they do today. I have definitely refined these principles! But here are a few kernels of Jiminy’s wisdom and a look at how I have incorporated this advice today.

“You should always do things the right way.” As a child, I really embraced the rules. Like most, I was a very concrete thinker and Jiminy’s advice made perfect sense. “Only a fool does things the wrong way!” he admonished. These days, I still take this to heart, but the “right way” is the way that works for me and intuitively feels aligned with my inner wisdom. Sometimes I have to ask myself what to do or how to get somewhere several times before I’m satisfied that it’s really right for me. But in this first fifty years, I’ve learned that going against my grain means a longer path to what works and a lot more discomfort than I’d like along the way. I have to trust that I already know the right way and just do it.

Giving it a Twirl

“You should always make time for fun.” Whenever I feel overwhelmed or cross, I can usually step back and see where I let go of fun. I’m one of those people who need a lot of laughter and lightness in my life. When I get my fun back, I’m back in balance.

“You can relax your body, but your mind should always stay alert.” Jiminy meant this as a way of ensuring that his audience wouldn’t fall through ice or play in a dangerous construction site. But for me, this adage has taken on a whole new meaning – one that sometimes makes me a little crazy! My brain almost never shuts down anymore – in fact, it really only rests when I pause to meditate, and even then I can sometimes wander around a conundrum of intrusive thoughts. I have had to learn to control those thoughts and stop ruminating on those that don’t serve me well. It’s simple but not easy! These days, I try to keep my mind alert with positive thinking rather than relenting to the anxiety that used to plague me.

“Never overload a boat.” My life choices so far have taught me a valuable lesson about adding too much to my life. There was a time that I volunteered more hours than most people work in a typical week! I tried to be all for all who needed me and put myself last on the list every time. That is until I learned about the importance of self care and saying no. My wiser, fifty-year old self knows that I can’t cram too much into one day without feeling like I’ve failed, so I have simply stopped overloading myself. Years ago, white space in my calendar might have made me feel like I was unpopular or unsuccessful. Now, lots of white space means I’m leaving a lot of room to work more efficiently with less stress. I take people with me on the boat sometimes, but they can’t all come at once and they have to be able to leave the boat when I say it’s time.

“He climbs up on a wobbly peak and what happens is no joke.” One of the greatest gifts I received when I entered into coach training was the knowledge I gained around the development of a personal foundation. It is also one of the most popular reasons my clients hire me – they want to regain control and build a solid foundation on which to create a successful life and career. We all realize the dangers of moving ahead without shoring up, yet sometimes we’ve had to do it anyway. Personal foundation work includes looking at what you value, what keeps you in your integrity, how to remove those things you are tolerating and, maybe most critical, how to set strong and consistent boundaries with yourself and with others. Most of my clients worry more about their personal foundation than the numbers on their balance sheets. They feel like their work time and the time spent living is out of balance. And conversely, when attention is paid here, success begins to fall more easily and naturally into place.

So it turns out this cartoon short from my childhood has served me well into the 20th anniversary of my 30th birthday. Thanks to Jiminy, I’m going to live a happy life while I’m moving ahead toward 103. Maybe I’ll see you there. I’ll be the one wearing a top hat and tails!

A Values Driven Philosophy


I created a visual representation of my values today using www.wordle.net.  (Thanks to Meg Hoffman for leading me to this great site!) I think any time you can see something visually it helps you to incorporate it more fully into your life and work. I also use a Values Assessment as fieldwork frequently as I think it is critical in assisting me as a coach to discover what opportunities provide the most authentic meaning in a client’s life and work. In other words, how can any of us engage in a meaningful life or career if we aren’t connecting to things that are important to us?

I used my values when creating a mission and philosophy for 4 Elements Coaching and for my other business, Nonprofit Staff Success International. During the creation phase of my business foundation. I included my values in my business plan and posted them on one website.  By communicating what I value most, I assist my clients in discovering more about me as a coach and as a business owner. And, whenever I come to a personal or business decision that feels heavy, I check in with my values to see whether the opportunity aligns with one or more of them. Because I value community, for example, I may decide to partner with a fellow coach to facilitate a weekend self care retreat which  connects women to other women who share the same challenges and can support solutions. Whenever I create new training content, I am actively aligned with my desire to enlighten my clients and to assist them in discovering new and innovative information that they can apply in their work. There really isn’t any aspect of my coaching businesses that isn’t somehow connected to one of these seven themes.

Do you know what you value? How does it show up in your work and in your life? How often do you check in to see if something you want to do, or feel compelled to do, is aligned with what matters the most?

Even if you aren’t ready to hire a coach, I’d love to help you discover your values and how you can apply this information to your career or to a situation where you need more clarity or movement.

Contact me at LaurieJohnson@4elementscoaching.com or by using our contact us form here and ask for a complimentary values assessment and coaching session. Don’t you owe it to yourself to create a rich life and satisfying work that flows around the things that are an integral part of who you are?



Your Personal Brand

I think all of us are aware of the effects branding can have on business. How many of you can see the familiar ‘swish’ and think, “Just Do It”? Or hear a beguiling British accent we now attribute to a gecko selling insurance and smile? Branding has a significant impact on sales by developing an awareness, then an affinity, and then a loyalty from the consumer.

Awhile back, I was offered the chance to do a 360° assessment on my personal brand to discover what others think about me and my value as a coach, leader and team player. I had never engaged in a 360° feedback assessment before so it was a little scary.  Asking others to provide honest, anonymous feedback about you requires a certain amount of courage. There’s also the fear that they won’t think enough of you take 10 minutes out of their day to complete the survey. I pushed the ‘send’ button after much deep breathing and a commitment to learn from the experience, come what may.

Surprisingly, almost half of my candidates provided feedback, which was the first remarkable moment. Next, I discovered that they had really great things to say about me! My most common personal brand attributes were Creative, Socially-conscious, Community-oriented, Intelligent and Supportive. My brand personas were Philanthropist, Caregiver, Self-starter, Expert, Motivator and Giver. Imagine how wonderfully these words penetrated my psyche! My greatest strengths resonated along these same lines.

Then I came to the part I was dreading – the feedback on weaknesses. Short comments spoke to the fact that I overextend myself and sometimes don’t follow up. I get caught up in stress and don’t make enough time to accomplish what I would like. I don’t always trust myself to know when to say no.  Did these comments surprise me? Absolutely not. Did they make me feel bad about myself? Actually, they did just the opposite. They allowed me to see what I already instinctively knew through the eyes of the people I work with, provide service to, and collaborate with on teams, boards and projects. I understood the theory of self care and setting strong boundaries, but I saw the effects on my personal brand first hand. It gave me a lot to unpack and examine in order to improve the way I do business – and my professional persona.

Discovering my personal brand through this lens caused me to begin the process of reshaping my boundaries and dramatically simplifying my life, to really look at the ways I can provide value to others in a new and streamlined way. The process seemed a little daunting at first, but it turned out to be an invaluable experience.  And although I may not continue to engage in such a systematic way of gathering a 360° reach, I can continue to evaluate my personal brand using external feedback and so can you.

I used William Arruda’s 360° Reach assessment and I highly recommend it.  But while I think that everyone should engage in a formalized 360° assessment at some point, there are some quick and informal ways of getting to the heart of what others believe to be true about you. You can create a personal branding survey using tools like Survey Monkey or Zoomerang, which both offer a free 30 day trial and a mechanism for anonymous feedback. Or you can just create a set of questions you would like your closest friends, colleagues or loyal clients to answer for you. Discovering your role on a team or your projective attributes can really assist you in examining how you work best with others and where your challenges might lie. Looking at how you form boundaries or what value you may or may not provide is critical feedback if you perform client services. Do your clients or colleagues have a high level of trust in your abilities? Are you overextending yourself? Chances are, this information can help you understand what others unconsciously or consciously think about when working with you.

Sure, this process can be a little daunting. But it can also be a tremendously rewarding experience. You may not have a catchy slogan or a likable mascot for your business, but chances are the uniqueness of you is pretty beguiling!



A Magical Day

Today is 10/10/10, a somewhat magical day in the world of numerology. I learned that a colleague got married today. In fact, many people decided to marry or do other exciting things on binary dates which are unique and memorable. You might not be planning something huge – maybe you didn’t plan anything at all. But it isn’t too late to consider a few things to make the day memorable.

 Another coach, Cheryl Richardson, decided to share a few lists today and I thought I would borrow her idea and create a few of my own. Take a look at my lists of Ten Things and then create your own based on what works for you. And enjoy this magical day!

 Ten Things I Will Say YES To:

1)      Time with my family

2)      A walk in the woods

3)      An hour a week of self care

4)      Moving my body

5)      Reading a good book

6)      Special notes and calls to my friends

7)      Lots of clean, fresh water to drink

8)      Gratitude journaling

9)      Creative time

10)   Petting my dogs


Ten Things I Will Say NO To:

1)      Gossip

2)      Negative Thoughts

3)      My inner censor who tells me I’m not good enough

4)      Drama and chaos

5)      Judgment of myself or others

6)      Stressful situations

7)      Clutter and messes

8)      Feelings of lack

9)      Procrastination

10)    Tolerations

 

Ten Things That Contribute to a Great Life

1)      A loving partner and/or family  

2)      Pets

3)      A daily practice of gratitude

4)      Supportive friends

5)      A mentor

6)      Work that inspires

7)      Beauty in all forms

8)      A quiet space to relax and feel comfortable

9)      A home that rises up to greet you

10)   A deep understanding of your authentic self

 I hope you will take time to make your own lists of Ten Things. When we take a moment to think about what we want to include in our lives, we really begin to design an environment that pulls us forward to where we long to be.

A Whole-Hearted Beginning

“There is a book inside of me.” You too?  I’ve known it since I was a child. In fact, the desire to write has been the only avocation that has been a constant in my life. This yearning to make a living as a writer is what I call my soul purpose. It is also a source of great frustration when I consider that unfinished book that still roams around the pathways of my brain, looking for an unlocked door that will lead to completion, or even a whole-hearted beginning.


What stops me? Any number of things. Time. Fear that I’m not good enough to write anything. Subject matter. Work. Children. Writer’s block. The heat of a Mississippi summer. You name it, I’ve probably tried to blame it.


I’m not even committed to fiction or nonfiction.  In fact, I think I have at least one of each floating around in there.  And as much as I love coaching, I know that I will always reserve some time to write something, even if it’s just a blog.


“Just a blog.” See how easily that rolled off the tongue?


This book is like an apparition that forms more fully at various times and then drifts away, hiding for awhile so that I settle comfortably again into my life of limiting literary beliefs.


The truth is we tell ourselves a lot of crazy things when it comes to creating art in any form. Creatives are often conflicted by limiting beliefs that may have originally been formed by a 2nd grade art teacher who told us we better not hope for a career as an artist. Or the college professor that ripped our Comp 1 paper to shreds, noting sarcastically in the margin, “I’m not sure you showed up today.”  Criticism is both the thing we crave and the thing we fear the most. It tears us up while validating our secret fears about ourselves.


Years ago, I was introduced to the book The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. I began reading and instantly felt a connection to the author, her struggle and her technique to help artists – creatives – go deep on a spiritual journey and come out on the other side, shiny and new.  I did the exercises and felt small shifts begin. And I kept the practice of morning pages to this day. But, hurricanes and weddings and classes and work got in the way and I put the book and the rest of the exercises aside, hoping for a magical day when everything would come together and words would pour out of me onto approximately 250 pages or so.


It’s not going to happen unless I make it happen.  And I know I’m not alone.


So I created this group – a year long journey through The Artist’s Way with some really neat people that I don’t really know who have the same fears and hopes and dreams for themselves and for their work.  As a coach, I can facilitate the work, bring in resources, guide participants to go deep within and watch synergy happen as master minds come together. As a group, the participants can show up each month and enrich the learning for me and for each other, bringing their best to the call and finding soul sisters and brothers that will celebrate successes with them forever.  


You don’t have to have a book inside of you to bring the element of creativity into your life. You don’t even have to have a desire to be anything. All that’s required is a curiosity about the work you want to do and a willingness to step out onto the path.  I’ll hold your hand if you’d like.

Connections

I am on a continuous awareness journey around strengths, both my own and the strengths of my clients who often hire me to discover what they want to be when they grow up. I have this desire for people to connect with work that makes them come alive. And, I have a desire to connect people with people, forming community and building on the collaborative strengths so that we effect change in our own backyards, oceans, cities and burgs.

Today, I had a conversation with a fellow coach who really gets this about me – that inner desire that I have for products, ideas, people, tweets, pages and colors to connect and join with each other in a way that brings beauty or brilliance to the world.  In fact, she and I connected through our mutual love and respect of Seth Godin and the upcoming Linchpin meetups. (And here, because of my love of connections, I must digress and inform you that if you’d like to participate in a meetup in your community, go to www.meetup.com and search Linchpin). I’m not sure that connectedness is just a strength of mine – I think it’s a way of being.

So here are a few additional connections I’ve made lately that bring me joy.

  • A set of green, battery free speakers that connect to your iPod – www.origaudio.com
  • A book that connects women to their inner, authentic self and how that self relates to food and God – Women Food and God by Geneen Roth
  • A man who connects you to Community – Peter Block
  • Jewelry that connects you to your energy muse – www.energymuse.com
  • MS Coaches Association – a group of coaches in Mississippi who connect regularly
  • Our local Main Street Association that drives business to our Main Street shops
  • Carolyn Haines, Alice Jackson, Virginia Schaefer and others who contributed to Delta Blues or helped promote it. (which also connected me to the knowledge that Alice and Mary Perkins are quite possibly as fascinated with the Kennedy assassination as I am!)

What a tapestry of connections I could weave here for you. Suffice it to say, I love the magic that happens when people meet, talk, share, tweet, create and explore.

So you know what would make me happy? Share your connections with me here so that I can make even more interesting connections that will change my little world in amazing ways.